This past Saturday evening, around 9 pm, I happen to be driving Elkhorn towards 80 (Greenback). I just turned off of Don Julio, and before the freeway, Hillsdale intersects at the bottom of an overpass, complete with a light and cross walk. I am center lane, a car on each side of me (odd because it was like “jet formation,” we formed a “V”… I am at the peak of the hill and I look straight ahead at the bottom of the hill, in the crosswalk, I see a guy running from the center median, and stop, center lane. My lane.
At this point, this doesn’t seem so bizarre, but wait, there’s more!
Fact- It was raining.
Fact- He was naked.
Fact- He did not stop to pick up something… he stopped to perform! Oh yea, perform is what he did…
(At this point, I am braking, wondering if the fighter pilots on each side of me see what’s going on as well… they do, and we all take a break from driving to see what this crazy naked rain dancer has prepared)
Naked Guy, does some sauntering, skipping in a circle, and arms above his head, spinning, twirling, Drunk Ballet maybe?… he curtseys, legs crossed, and spins, faces away from us and bows again, BARE ASS to the 3 stopped cars…
Still not weird enough? Ok, there’s more!
After his bow, he bends down again, grips a butt cheek in each hand, spreads them, gives a wink, (ok, I made up the wink part, I don’t actually know if he winked), and began to make his ass “talk,” fluttering his hands back and forth, Ace Ventura style.
At this point, I look to the cars on either side of me. We all have the same, “uh… We should honk but this is kinda entertaining” looks on our faces… Naked Dude makes the next move. He stands up straight, turns and faces his captive audience, takes one more bow, and runs to the right side of the intersection….
Still… There is more!
Naked Dude is not alone. There is Naked Dude #2 AND! Naked Dude #3 at the corner of the crosswalk. They do a little Naked Dude Happy Dance- congratulating Naked Dude 1 on his performance I can only assume… here’s the thing. Naked Dude #3 is in a wheel chair! Naked. This makes me wonder, I can tell Naked Dude’s 1 & 2 were really into this by the obvious displays of enthusiasm…. But I wonder about Naked Dude #3 aka, Naked Wheel Chair Dude. Was he really a willing participant? Did they booze him up, strip him naked, and decide to Joy Ride down Elkhorn/Greenback on Naked Wheelchair Dude’s ride? AND! As I drove away, I was curious…. How many U-Turns would I have to make, in order to see Naked Wheel Chair Dude’s performance?
At this point, this doesn’t seem so bizarre, but wait, there’s more!
Fact- It was raining.
Fact- He was naked.
Fact- He did not stop to pick up something… he stopped to perform! Oh yea, perform is what he did…
(At this point, I am braking, wondering if the fighter pilots on each side of me see what’s going on as well… they do, and we all take a break from driving to see what this crazy naked rain dancer has prepared)
Naked Guy, does some sauntering, skipping in a circle, and arms above his head, spinning, twirling, Drunk Ballet maybe?… he curtseys, legs crossed, and spins, faces away from us and bows again, BARE ASS to the 3 stopped cars…
Still not weird enough? Ok, there’s more!
After his bow, he bends down again, grips a butt cheek in each hand, spreads them, gives a wink, (ok, I made up the wink part, I don’t actually know if he winked), and began to make his ass “talk,” fluttering his hands back and forth, Ace Ventura style.
At this point, I look to the cars on either side of me. We all have the same, “uh… We should honk but this is kinda entertaining” looks on our faces… Naked Dude makes the next move. He stands up straight, turns and faces his captive audience, takes one more bow, and runs to the right side of the intersection….
Still… There is more!
Naked Dude is not alone. There is Naked Dude #2 AND! Naked Dude #3 at the corner of the crosswalk. They do a little Naked Dude Happy Dance- congratulating Naked Dude 1 on his performance I can only assume… here’s the thing. Naked Dude #3 is in a wheel chair! Naked. This makes me wonder, I can tell Naked Dude’s 1 & 2 were really into this by the obvious displays of enthusiasm…. But I wonder about Naked Dude #3 aka, Naked Wheel Chair Dude. Was he really a willing participant? Did they booze him up, strip him naked, and decide to Joy Ride down Elkhorn/Greenback on Naked Wheelchair Dude’s ride? AND! As I drove away, I was curious…. How many U-Turns would I have to make, in order to see Naked Wheel Chair Dude’s performance?
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